Remember pre-kids when you saw that grouchy unkept mom with two toddlers in her shopping cart snap at the Target cashier for no reason and you thought “what a bitch”. I remember standing patiently in line sipping my Starbucks, tapping my cute kitten heel on the floor and glancing through the latest People, thinking “come on, does having kids really entitle you to have such a negative attitude…and how hard is it run a brush through your hair!”
Well, when it comes to the reality of parenthood, having triplets has been a slap in the face in many ways. Ok, I totally get it…but I’m not grumpy ALL the time. And I normally pride myself on being very nice to people when they make triplet comments, even when it is the 5th time I’ve heard “You must have your hands full” that day. It is VERY rare for a bitchy comeback to come out of my mouth.
Therefore, I sincerely apologize to the nice lady at the pool the other day. While attempting to change all 3 of my children out of their wet bathing suits (which by the way, pulling down swim diapers on a toddler is like peeling off tight leather pants, three times….not that I would know), and into dry diapers, clothes and shoes; my daughters ended up with either two right or two left feet. Needless to say, they were a little “clumsy” while leaving the pool. After attempting to get dressed myself I admit I looked a little “haggard” as I left the pool with 3 kickboards, an ENORMOUS beach bag and 3 toddlers in tow. On the way down the steps Josie took a little spill and everyone in the vicinity heard her overdramatic reaction. As usual, I try to look like the awesome put together triplet mom that I am and calmly sooth Josie as I notice her shoes don’t look right. I bend over to try to fix her shoes as my pool bag contents spill across the ground. A sweet mom of one comes over to lend a hand and picks up the wet disposable swim diapers for me giving me a “pitiful” look. ”I know” I’m thinking, “its ridiculous I save these swim diapers but when you are buying for three and you swim as often as we do, they can get expensive (did you know they can go through the washer and dryer several times in tact? BTW, I assure you, I do not save the poopy ones)” . Then it hits me, she probably didn’t even notice the recycled swim diapers; rather she was probably thinking “wow, this poor mom has her hands ridiculously full, barely has her shorts zipped, and didn’t even get a chance to comb her hair. She could really use a break today.” As I realize Josie’s shoes cannot be fixed since she has both left feet, I surrender to the fact my girls are wearing the wrong shoes and return her second left foot. At about this time the mom says “oh, that isn’t going to solve your problem because your girl’s have the wrong shoes on…they are both wearing only right or left feet.” I smile up at her and “politely” say “Thank you. I realize that but does it really look like I care? Do you think it makes sense to attempt to fix this tiny shoe mix-up right now?”
At that, I grab my child and meet the rest of the clan at the van, not even looking to see the sweet young (stupid) mother’s reaction. Whoops, just like that I became “that bitchy mom”. Well, life goes on. I’ll try to be more polite next time I’m ready to lose my mind.